Post-grad life has been a whirlwind. I have been stretched and I have been challenged and I am convinced that my head has nearly fallen off multiple times.
Love is sacrifice, and I think I hear that a lot. Living it, that’s an entirely different story. Sacrifice. Even the word sounds hard.
But in this mess of life that I have made and experienced since that last fateful drive home from college two years ago, love has been at the center of everything.
I have been challenged to love people I didn’t want to love, I have been challenged to let go of people I really wanted to love, I have been challenged to actually just love God.
Not look good for God, not work hard for God, just love God.
In confusion (which is all the time) usually the only way out I can find is love. I find myself saying: just will the good, just do the next sacrifice it takes, just make the time to pray.
It is as if I have been lead from one thing to another by love.
There are moments of clarity and I can tell that there must be something outside of me that is keeping my head from falling off. I can tell she wishes I would just look into the Light for one second and stop being a dumb ox.
“…a woman clothed with the sun, with the moon under her feet, and on her head a crown of twelve stars” -Rev 12:1
Oh how that woman mothers me. That blessed woman. I have seen stubborn children, children that reach for electrical sockets and stoves multiple times, even with correction and will not stop until they are removed from the environment. I imagine that is how the Blessed Virgin Mary looks at me. She constantly lovingly corrects me, over and over again, and I constantly insist on my own decisions.
Luckily, she sticks with me.
She is the mother of all, and she is my Mother. I believe it is her who is guiding me from love to love. I know that my desire to be like her comes from God and gives me the grace to follow her from love to love.
When I am lost in the sea of adulting she is the Star who leads me back to Truth, to Life, and to Love.